I’d like to share with you some lessons I learned from my Mom.
When I was looking through her jewelry drawer to get ready for today, I realized there wasn’t anything
“traditionally valuable” in there, but she had every holiday pin you could imagine—leprechauns, valentine cats, bunnies, pumpkins, turkeys, Santa, Frosty, Rudolph.
Lesson #1—Spreading joy is more important than a spreadsheet.
She also had in there pins from the hospital and the Red Cross. She always knew she wanted to be a nurse and kept up her license until the end. She worked 30 years in the hospital and when we were out shopping or whatever, people would often stop her and say you took good care of my mother or themselves. I also remember going with her to care for people in the community after an accident or with an illness. Summer people would often show up at our door that needed to be bandaged or whatever.
Lesson #2—Do something you love and dedicate yourself to it.
Speaking of summer people, her sisters Aunt Jan and Aunt Kitty were able to spend summers here at the old house as they were teachers. Growing up, our summers were filled with food, music, glorious lake days, neighbors, card games, and Labor Day clambakes that went on for days.
Lesson #3—Enjoy life, have fun!
I also didn’t find any of her credit cards—she never owned one. You make do with what you have, work for the things you want, and take ownership and pride in what you do have.
Lesson #4—You can be frugal without being cheap.
We loved to take long walks to the lake or in the woods. She used to take me hunting with her before arthritis made that too difficult, and I was always too noisy anyway. She also loved her cats: Prissy, Missy, Jiffy, Dave, Puddin, Jello, Brat Cat, Little Cat, Louie, DJ, Simon, and Sam to name a few. Our dogs were limited to Spot 1 and Spot 2. We have 65 acres of woods behind, but they all wanted to cross 507, not always successfully. She spent her last days watching Animal Planet.
Lesson #5—Love and respect nature.
The Ansleys are great letter writers—after living all over the world, my parents didn’t just “move on” from people—they sent and received literally hundreds of Christmas cards. I loved to sit and look through them all. Her great joy in retirement was going to lunch with nurses she worked with, nurses she trained with, family, neighbors—whatever.
Lesson #6—Keep in touch.
She always drove a big station wagon—to see her little head in that great big car! We were the car that drove to all the high school basketball games. She always had a baseball game on the radio or her beloved Yankees on TV. She planned her vacation around the World Series. I’m thankful she never saw the headline saying “Boston Sweeps.”
Lesson #7—No games, just sports.
I also found lots of recipes. The skinniest person on earth, she loved her goodies. She always had a bowl of homemade ranch dip in the fridge and cheese and crackers and butter. She made the best Christmas cookies—full of sugar, rolled and dipped in sugar. I’m sure many of you received a tray, as she gave away dozens. She didn’t just love the icing on the cake—she was the icing on the cake.
Lesson #8—Be sweet.
And finally, I found lots of pictures and mementos—of us, my Dad, her grandkids and nieces and nephews and friends and their kids. I found a note dated 4/29/65 that simply said, “I ran away, Love, Bill” Those things were her treasure.
Lesson #9—Use things, love people, not the other way around.
Her feet were so bad the last few years, she hasn’t been able to wear shoes, but I saw a pair there and took them with me. I just hope I can fill them.
Thank you.
